the spin-off
Whittaker’s made a block of chocolate that tastes like an Easter egg from The Warehouse.
After much hype, Whittaker’s has officially announced its latest offering: Oat Milk, a plant-based alternative to milk chocolate. Mad Chapman delivers her verdict.
OPINION: We were so excited, weren’t we? We heard a whisper on the wind that a… oat milk chocolate was on its way, courtesy of the best chocolate makers in the country. I even wrote a whole news story about it. Whittaker rarely fails. The creamy milk block is arguably the best basic block of chocolate in the world, so as someone with a mild to moderate dairy allergy (meaning if I ate half a block, I’d turn into a beehive and shit myself at the same time). wanted oat milk to be good.
It was not.
My apologies! I’m as disappointed as you are, but sadly, the previously invincible Whittaker’s has stumbled. What could have been a small step for chocolate and a big step for vegans has instead made the vegan in the office (not me) say today, “I’ll stick with my dark chocolate, thanks.”
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The beginning was promising. Classic packaging with a beautiful green trim and the refined lettering. “Creamy plant-based chocolate”, it promised. Vegetable, yes. Chocolate, no doubt. Creamy? I’m going to say no. And therein lies the pinch. Whittaker’s teamed up with Harraways Oats to create this flavor, stating “Whittaker’s has found a way to use existing factory equipment to grind locally sourced Harraways oats to create Whittaker’s Oat Milk”. Now wait a minute. Here I thought an oat milk chocolate would replace dairy milk with oat milk and, bada bing bada boom, a vegan classic was born. But did they trade the milk for real oats? So not only did they venture into a new realm in plant-based chocolate, but decided to make the oat milk themselves?
If I was in charge at Whittaker’s – and I am well aware that I am not – I would just partner with an existing oat milk company rather than an oat cereal company.
Because this chocolate is grainy.
The first warning signs were in the smell. It smelled waxy, like cheap chocolate. Except that this chocolate probably costs the same as any other Whittaker’s block and therefore is not cheap.
But scents can be deceiving, so I bit into it with high hopes. Unfortunately the smell was right.
Unlike creamy milk (melts wonderfully in your mouth) or classically dark (melts wonderfully a little slower in your mouth), the oat milk chocolate was firm and had virtually no immediate taste. I gave it some time but the taste never showed up. Instead, it remained a muted, grainy version of dairy milk until the very last bite. The waxy film stayed in my mouth for the rest of the afternoon.
After all that fanfare, Whittaker’s has made a block of chocolate that tastes like an Easter egg from The Warehouse. If you love Easter eggs from The Warehouse and wish you could eat an entire family block of them, you’re in luck.
Otherwise, I’d recommend some dark chocolate and a glass of oat milk instead.