DEAR DEIDRE: MY boyfriend and I revived our relationship for a passionate night — but it also included his new girlfriend.
We were together for three years and had a tumultuous relationship. We are both fiery and would have big fights, but the “makeup sex” was always great.
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We broke up because, although the physical side of our relationship was exciting, we wanted different things.
I went to university to study art and he continued to work in our hometown for his family’s real estate company. I am 25 and he is 27.
We kept in touch through social media. I had a few flirtations, but nothing serious.
But when I saw that he had met someone new, I felt a stab in the heart.
My group of friends and I had tickets to a big local festival and I knew he would probably be there.
So I made sure I looked good. I was wearing my favorite playsuit and was practically covered in glitter.
Sure enough, we ran into each other and he was with his girlfriend.
I felt self-conscious, especially since his girlfriend was draped over him permanently.
But since he knew my friends, we decided to have a drink together.
As the afternoon progressed, I found myself dancing and having fun with his new girlfriend.
At the end of the night my friends went back to our tent, but this girl asked me back to theirs for “some fun”.
As soon as we got there, we all undressed and started exploring each other.
It was great to have sex with him again and a bonus to have her around.
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I left the next morning feeling like I had spent time with someone very special – and I wasn’t thinking about my ex-boyfriend.
My ex has contacted me again to ask if I’d like a rematch, and I would – but not with him around. Should I contact her?
DEIDRE SAYS: You enjoyed a nice evening with this woman and your ex-boyfriend who completely surprised you.
You admire her a lot, but remember that you don’t really know her – you spent a drunken night together and she is unavailable.
Save yourself a lot more confusion and upset by avoiding further threesomes with your ex and his new girlfriend.
While threesomes can work for some – especially if clear boundaries are agreed upon – as you experience, problems arise when emotions come into play.