oin Morgan said he would have felt like a “cheater” wasting a cap if he played one more game for England after deciding it was time to retire during the recent tour of the Netherlands.
Morgan woke up on Monday 20 June, the day after England played the second of three ODIs in Amsterdam, and knew it was his time to retire. He will continue in local cricket but will not set a time frame on how long.
“I’m very happy,” Morgan said. “I was not emotional, but day by day it hit me. It was a difficult day, but since then I have been very satisfied.
“I remember going to sleep when I wrote notes on various different things, team-oriented at the World Cup, how to get there, what we do … ordinary things I do. And I slept well. I woke up the next morning with just a whole different feeling, one I had never had before.
“It is difficult to describe unless you go through it. I did a lot of research over the last three years in the run-up to this transition and talked to a lot of different players about it. The most common theme is it is a feeling. When you know, you know.
“And I always thought they were full of s ***. Sincerely, I always sat there thinking, ‘I’m not sure about that,’ because I was not through it, and I did not know it.
“But Monday is how it felt. Just be myself, be honest about what it meant to me and what it meant to the team. I think it helped that I planned it along the way and that there were contingency plans, both for myself and the team. So that made it a lot easier. ”
England had one more game left in the series, which put Morgan out with a slight groin injury.
Asked if he felt he would spill a cap on England’s path to the World Cup, Morgan said: “It’s completely unfair, and it goes against everything I stand for. I would just like a felt cheated. ”
Morgan said the injury was “real.” He added: “It’s part of you waking up with a feeling, and I’ve woken up before with back spasms and slipped slides and all sorts of things, and you think Jesus Christ, how am I going to get out of bed? And “You work your way out of bed and you think, right, I see a way forward. It’s part of the decision, so it’s a previous injury that flared up again, and again that contributes to the decision.”
Eoin Morgan with the ICC World Cup
/ Getty ImagesMorgan said his decision to retire was due to a combination of factors, including his poor form (he made two ducks in Amsterdam) and fitness issues.
“I can not point out one thing,” he said. “Simply because when I went to peel back exactly how it felt and what it was, it’s a highlight of things. It’s a highlight of being away for a considerable period, over a long career, making decisions, build relationships, must do so constantly.
“Yes, I was out of shape, but before, when I was out of shape, I could see a picture of it. If the team did shit, I can see a picture of it. I could not see either. And if you take into account where the World Cup is in October, that’s the feeling that day … it felt a million miles away. ”
Morgan said “it was quite emotional” to inform his teammates that he would retire.
“I thought they would all be happy to kick me out the door,” he said. “But I just feel lucky enough to know some of the characters in the group and to be on and off the field through those moments in their lives. When guys are injured, more challenging times, and the parts of life you want to be for. So yes, it was not easy. “