How I Made It: ‘I’m an Aromantic-Asexual Activist – and I’m Being Abused’

Welcome back to How I made itMetro.co.uk’s weekly career travel series.

This week we talk to activist Yasmin Benoit26, for those who campaign asexual inclusion and visibility – and much more.

It’s not an easy task – because she often sees her in the firing line of Twitter trolls and worse, but knowing she has a positive aspect in the world gives her strength.

She tells Metro.co.uk: ‘People only see the cool days, where I get ready for red carpets, do photo shoots, sit in a studio somewhere in front of the camera or behind the microphone, or speak on stage.

“But I’m my own manager, so everything I get, I have to get myself.”

Here’s how she made it.

Hey Yasmine. How would you describe your job?

I feel like someone who has many jobs with the same goal!

I’m an aromantic-asexual activist, model, speaker, writer, researcher, consultant, and “influencer” (like the term or not, I can no longer ignore it).

How did you turn asexuality activism into a profession?

It was never really part of the plan.

I had no idea it was something that could potentially be a career.

In some ways it’s not alone, it’s a combination of many different jobs for the same purpose.

What was the process like to build that platform and reputation? Was there a ‘big break’ moment?

I had a bit of a head start because I had already built a modest platform through my modeling.

I already had a pretty good awareness of branding, marketing, leveraging connections and the media, creating content etc.

I feel like some of the “big break” moments came before I was ready — like when I was on the cover of the activism issue of Attitude Magazine, when I partnered with Budweiser to launch Ace of Clubs on Pride in London 2019, when I was invited to Prague Pride as a special guest… I didn’t feel like I had really done enough to be seen as a ‘leader’ by anyone.

Seeing the initial interest, I did my best to capitalize on it strategically and build on the momentum.

I networked my ass, made sure I was seen by the right people in the right places, and more importantly, I made sure what I was producing warranted the attention.

I studied speakers, I studied writers, I studied other activists, how they get their message across, I researched, learned, practiced, I did a lot of things that ended up failing and some things that worked out well.

It’s all trial and error. There is no blueprint for it.

Have you ever worked in another industry and now made the leap to work?

I wasn’t so much working in another industry, but I was planning to.

My bachelor’s degree was in Sociology and I graduated from UCL with an MSc in Crime Science.

Most of the people in my education went on to work for the government or became full-time academics.

Most of my friends, pre-activism, were all teachers. So I assumed I would do something more conventional.

But when I graduated and began to see that my activism was taking off, I decided to take a risk and focus on this, rather than taking on a regular job.

How did you get into modeling?

It certainly wasn’t something I was ever scouted or encouraged to do.

No one ever told me, “You’re so beautiful, you should model.”

I actually got into it for the other reason, because I thought I looked weird and I wanted to be one of those “weird models.”

So I built my own odd portfolio by working with local photographers, and then I started to spark the interest of brands in the UK – and eventually other countries – mostly alternative brands.

However, as I started branching out more, I realized that lingerie was a genre that suited me quite well because of my physique.

Using platforms like Instagram definitely helped as it was a great way to showcase my portfolio and reach new people.

Like everything else I do, it was all largely self-managed trial and error!

How does it work for you financially with having a portfolio career – do you ever worry about money when one month is quieter than the next, or are you so well established now that it’s not an issue?

Oh, that’s definitely still a problem!

At the end of the day, I’m a freelancer with about… five jobs. So of course I worry about money all the time.

I often hear people speculate about how I use my asexuality to make a lot of money, but who has ever made a lot of money by being asexual?

Activism in itself isn’t a huge money maker – it’s something you do, it’s useful, but you do have the financial means to survive.

I don’t have financial stability or a steady income.

There are months when I have a lot of work and others when I don’t have much to do. That’s the reality.

I always say it’s not a lot of money, it’s just quick money.

What someone could earn in a few weeks of full time work I could earn in a few hours, but a job like that may not come for a month or it may come out of nowhere with a 24 hour deadline, so you always be ready and always keep showing yourself, just in case that opportunity doesn’t come soon.

Really, the saving grace is that I don’t have a lot of spending, so I have the opportunity to save.

What’s the best thing about what you do?

The best aspect of what I do is knowing that I have a positive impact on the world.

There’s only so much you can do as one person on this huge, overcrowded planet, so being able to help as many people as possible – more than I would physically encounter in my life – is something that is still surreal to me.

When someone contacts me and tells me that my work has made a difference in their lives, it motivates me to keep doing it.

What’s the worst?

It’s hard to pick just one.

The increasing lack of anonymity, always being recognized for something that provokes uncomfortable debate and criticism, the horrendous abuse online (and sometimes in person), and the overall dehumanization that comes with being seen as a “public figure” to any degree.

That’s something people never warn you about.

Once you’re seen as a commodity rather than a person, you’re treated as such… and not necessarily in a good way.

Considering how personal your work is, how do you create boundaries so you can switch off and stay emotionally safe?

To be honest, I’m still working on that.

It’s a boundary that’s hard to set for any freelancer who needs to stay engaged to secure work.

At the same time, my activism means that I am expected to be as accessible as possible to everyone at all times.

The main way I manage to create some boundaries is by giving myself permission to say “no” to things.

I limit the number of apps and platforms I use. I’ll delete them until I have a project to post about.

I don’t force myself to answer every message, or take any unpaid job just to be helpful. I don’t mind blocking people either.

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