This year everyone seems united to throw it all at them Christmas.
The guy I bought my tree from in November had his own theory as to why.
As I tapped my card to pay, I sheepishly muttered, “I don’t know why I’m putting it up so early this year.”
The scruffy student, dressed like an elf—whose day consisted of pulling nets over trees like giant condoms—looked me straight in the eye and said, “Everyone’s doing it early this year, because we’re all depressed.”
Then I carried the tree home in silence.
I had just been diagnosed depression by a boy with a bun who was 10 years younger than me?
Are we really all depressed? Or are we all so excited at the prospect of finally seeing our families for Christmas that we’ve gone a little crazy? Are we putting so much pressure on ourselves this year that we are now going overboard?
With the frost in the air, the snow on the ground, the threat of Covid (almost) separating families, this festive season is clearly the best and most Christmassy in years.
As a result, this year I committed earlier than ever to knocking down the tree in November. ‘Who cares?’ I thought.
My last two Christmas parties were ruined due to having Covid so I thought I would go all out and milk this one for all he has. I even slapped a picture of my decorated tree on Instagram and waited for the inevitable.
Surely people would respond by calling me a freak for fixing up my tree before the bonfire night was over and dusted off?
All I got was a few thumbs up, some Santa emojis, and a few people sent me pictures of their trees that they too put up early. I was surprised and suddenly started to wonder if going big this year was the right thing to do.
As I said, being Covid positive for the past two years, the festive periods have been very stripped down affairs – just me, my partner and our daughter, a few Zoom calls to family and a smaller dinner.
And I have to be honest, I didn’t hate it. Instead of trying to split ourselves in a thousand different ways, to keep up with social obligations that drag us here, there, and everywhere, we focused on enjoying each other’s company properly and had some of our best Christmases ever.
That’s why I get a little trepidation when I think about the prospect of another big family gathering.
It goes without saying that while this is the first proper post-Covid Advent season, it is also important to consider the state of the country. That this Christmas will be truly awful for so many people.
Temperatures have dropped and people cannot afford to heat their homes properly. Mold will spread in humid conditions, and god forbid more unnecessary deaths from poor housing.
With the crisis in the cost of living As they move across Britain, people will struggle to afford presents and gifts this year.
Libraries and community centers heated for retirees will fill up with people wishing they were with their families, and lines at soup kitchens and food banks are likely to be longer than ever.
There are also still thousands of people who are still in isolation, and an estimated 2.2 million people who struggle with long-term Covid – even now, when the world seems to have forgotten.
Covid or no Covid, this holiday season could be a lot gloomier than the last.
So there’s a lot to be said for keeping the numbers small and not pushing ourselves harder than necessary.
It is true that this is the season of giving, but nowadays we spend a large part of our time giving as much as possible. And I’m not just talking about presents.
If you are a couple, whose family do you go to? If you have kids, all the grandparents want to see them. Kids don’t feel like a day of fun – they want to play with the toys Santa just gave them.
This year, we need to prioritize being kind to each other
And personally, as the nominally elected chef most years, I want to simplify my job of cooking for as few people as possible. Drink as and when I want, without having to drive anywhere – and no complaints if I choose to fall asleep at 5 p.m.
I realize it feels like I’m auditioning for a part in a new series of BBC’s Grumpy Old Men, but for many of us this is the truth right now. Without sounding like one Grinchan easy Christmas appeals to me more than a big, cozy Christmas – and ultimately, if we all want to see each other so much, why don’t we do it for the rest of the year?
The spirits of last year’s loneliness encourage us all to give it our all this year. But it’s worth remembering that we may not have “everything” to give.
The country is in a pitiful state, services are being stripped as workers fight for a fair wage, pockets are empty and it’s really hard to get baked potatoes right.
And while I’ll be spending Christmas with my extended family, I’ll make sure I’m not overworked, or too far away from my most important people – my daughter and my partner.
This year, we need to prioritize being kind to each other. Don’t overstretch or give in to pressure by keeping it small or intimate.
We have all year to be festive, and the past few weeks have been some of the hardest we’ve had – so don’t force it and enjoy what really matters.
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