Relationship expert reveals the EXACT questions you should be asking on dates if you’re over 30 — and it might be hard for some to hear
- Relationship expert Mel Schilling has revealed the most important questions to ask on dates
- The advice is aimed at men and women over the age of 30, she explained
- They are for finding out if you are aligned on important issues
Relationship expert Mel Schilling revealed the exact questions to ask on dates if you’re over 30, including whether or not you want to be monogamous.
The psychologist turned trust coach explained that both men and women also need to be direct when it comes to wanting to have a family to avoid heartbreak later.
In one piece before Yahoo the MAFS relationship coach explained that singles should ask themselves what their purpose is before they hit the spot.
MAFS relationship expert Mel Schilling has revealed the exact questions to ask on dates when you’re over 30, including whether or not you want to be monogamous
They should ask if they are ready for a monogamous relationship, if they want to become parents and how far in the future they see that happening,” she explains.
“Know thyself is the best advice here — by being confident and honest with yourself about what you really want, you can be candid with your dates so expectations are clear from the start,” she said.
She added that it is important for men to know where they are in their life cycle and to be at the forefront at all times to avoid wasting a date’s time.
“If you want kids, be sensitive to the way you discuss this when you’re dating a woman. The fertility journey can be fraught with challenges, pain, fear, expectations and disappointment for many women,” she warned.
Women also need to figure out if they want to start a family and be aware that it can get more difficult every year.
“While I don’t believe you ‘owe’ your date anything, especially on a first date, it’s a good opportunity to test the waters in terms of attunement about the baby issue,” she said.
Working out if you’re really on the same page when it comes to core values, you’ll avoid heartache later — especially when it comes to monogamy and starting a family
Asking questions to check the baby’s alignment without “putting too much pressure” is key, she explained.
She also suggested open-ended questions about what life will be like ten years from now, rather than “guide them through your endometriosis journey.”
People should also know their core values before entering the dating world, especially if they are looking for a long-term relationship.
You can check if your potential partner’s values match by asking more open-ended questions that reveal their motivations, frustrations, passions, and pet hate.
These questions can be fun, and you can ask them to share their best vacation experiences, for example.