CARING for a heavy drinker is tough. But by encouraging them to seek support, you can improve their health and your own.
The NHS says addiction is “not having control over doing, taking, or using something to the point where it could be harmful to you”.
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Often associated with gamble† drugs† alcohol and to smoke, it is possible to be addicted to “just about everything”. Signs of addiction include:
- Often feel the need to drink or take drugs.
- Getting into trouble due to drinking or drug use.
- Others notice how much you drink or use drugs and warn you.
- Your drinking or drug use is causing problems.
Andrew Misell from Alcohol change UK has these tips for talking to them. † †
READY, SET UP…
“Plan what you’re going to say first,” Andrew says. Entering into a conversation blindly can make you both upset and frustrated and can make it more difficult to openly talk to each other again.
Take your time and, if it helps you focus and be clear, take notes.
NO DEBT
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YOU may be nervous, but be honest without turning the chat into a confrontation. “Try not to criticize or blame,” Andrew says.
“Talk with empathy about their drinking and the effect it has on you.”
RIGHT TIME
AVOID trying to carry on the conversation when the other person is drinking or having a hangover.
Pick a time when they are sober and therefore more likely to listen to you. If the conversation gets a little heated, accept that it might not be the right time and try again later.
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REMEMBER the NHS is always there to support you and your loved one. “Encourage them to sign up for a checkup with their primary care physician,” Andrew says.
Their doctor can assess the person’s alcohol consumption and talk to them about recommended limits and treatment options.
BE CAREFUL
IT’S OK to take care of them. “Encourage them to drink plenty of water so they don’t become dehydrated and eat regularly, especially before they start drinking,” Andrew says.
“Make sure they don’t endanger themselves and others by drink-driving.”
FEEL HOPE
TRY not to despair and grab the small wins whenever and wherever you can. “Stay positive about their ability to change and praise all the small changes they can make,” Andrew says.
We all appreciate positive feedback and it will make them feel supported.
SELF CARE
“IF you’re having trouble with someone else’s drinking, it’s important to know that you’re not alone and that support is available,” Andrew says.
“There are also organizations that offer help and advice specifically for family members.” See alcoholchange.org.uk for more info.