It seems like lesbian dating shows are like buses: you wait your whole life for one to show up and then two come at once.
Last year, Netflix dropped The ultimatum: strange lovein which all-female and non-binary couples face a crossroads in their relationships, ending the process either married or divorced.
And now we have that I kissed a girlThe sequel to BBC Three's I Kissed A Boythat of Great Britain first gay dating show that was a real resounding success.
With Dannii Minogue back as everyone's favorite gay matchmakerI Kissed A Girl starts with, you guessed it, a kiss, before the new couples get to know each other and, well, drama ensues…
The internet is buzzing with excitement – finally, lesbians have the chance to find love in a chaotic dating show, just like our heterosexual counterparts have done for decades.
There's no denying that this will provide life-affirming representation for countless queer people. After years of watching from the sidelines, we now get the chance to play.
Sure, it'll be messy and probably very cringe-inducing, but no one said gay representation on TV had to be perfect. Either way, I Kissed A Girl will be another breath of fresh air on the dating show scene.
My only concern, I guess, is whether people will watch for the wrong reasons.
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It's no secret that lesbian sex is sexualized.
Personally, I have become so afraid to even use the word. Every time someone called me 'lesbian' it was in a derogatory way. “Lesbian” was thrown around as a dirty term, something to be ashamed of.
It took me a long time to feel comfortable identifying as a lesbian.
There's also a reason why “lesbian” remains one of the most popular porn categories. No matter how much society advances and attitudes towards LGBTQ+ people improve, cisgender men continue to use women who love women (WLW) for their own sexual pleasure.
Our expressions of sexuality continue to provide morbid satisfaction to people who actually don't care about our rights or our safety at all.
We continue to be the porn of men who – let's be honest – although they are quick to point out when we kiss, they would not be so quick to intervene if they saw us being abused in public.
And while you may argue that it's “not that deep,” I implore you to remember that sexualization and fetishization are not the same as acceptance.
So as I Kissed A Girl hits our screens, my concerns about who exactly will tune in increase.
I know how I'm going to watch. With a smile on my face, probably a tear in my eye, so in love and happy that my community is getting a chance to shine for the first time in my life after so many of us grew up believing that we don't deserve love.
But in the back of my mind, those concerns will be there.
Is there a middle-aged cis man watching this wide-eyed and experiencing some sort of sexual excitement from the way one girl places a gentle hand on another girl's thigh, or the way she leans in for a sweet kiss in a romantic moment?
The hypersexualization of lesbians and queerness among women is a real problem facing our community – because it affects us beyond the TV screen.
While I have no doubt that Dannii – our gay Cupid – and the BBC will create a safe and respectful environment for the participants of I Kissed A Girl, what happens when the cameras stop rolling?
Every day, lesbians have to think twice before kissing their partners in public. We drop our grip on each other's hands when a man walks past us on the street.
We must tolerate endless threesome propositions, threats, and derisive comments from those who think lesbians are a “challenge,” or something to be “overcome” or “solved.” And it's tiring.
So yes, to finally have our relationships represented on TV is a huge step forward and so exciting. I love knowing that young gay people now have the opportunity to grow up with less trauma and suffering.
The first lesbian kiss in Coronation Street made headlines across the country in 2010, and I was acutely aware of people's negative reactions to it.
But we need to do the work off and on screen, dismantling stereotypes, breaking harmful myths, challenging lesbophobia and showing that lesbians are valued and respected far beyond sexual pleasure.
With Dannii Minogue back at the helm for this new dating show, I think we're heading in the right direction.
She is the perfect person to host this show, and hopefully her support for the community translates into living rooms far and wide.
Oh, and if we can make Katy Perry's iconic tune the theme song for I Kissed A Girl, that might take some of the edge off.
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